we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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