Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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