I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
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if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
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So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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