Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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