my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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