he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
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I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Holy shit dude........stairs
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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