Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
you had me at cake vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Send help, water and tortillas.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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