My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
she pinky promised me she was 18
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
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