Sry I called you an 8
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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