I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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