I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
she looked like the before picture.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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