i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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