Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize