I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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