I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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