69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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