You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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