don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
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