Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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