the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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