the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize