I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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