At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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