READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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