Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
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