I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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