There is no way he is gay with that hair.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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