I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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