No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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