bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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