i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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