I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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