Your face is a jimmy john
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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