Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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