yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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