My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
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Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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