They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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