I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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