ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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