I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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