someone get that fucking seahorse.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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