took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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