Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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