Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize