I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
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I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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