ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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