Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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