I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Boobs are out for the taking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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