you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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