I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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